So I’m stupid

So I’m not sure what’s going on but lately I’ve been blah. Now this blah isn’t blah depression, just blah something, may be blah lost or confusion but I feel stupid.

Yes I used the word many of us feel from time to time, stupid, but it has become something more, much more.

I am newly 30 years old, living with Bipolar 1, schizo-effective, anxiety, and ptsd and I take medication for it. Now through the 10+ years my body has been treated like a guinea pig with countless amounts of medicine, that now today some side effects have surfaced to 100%. This is beyond the tolerable of 0-99%.

I feel dumb, stupid, you pick the word, either way I have lost my spark.

One thing is that I am losing my reasoning comands, I have been finding it difficult to read and spell certain key basic words, and so on.

I’m scared that I’m losing it……

I have appt with psychiatrist tomorrow, therapy in two weeks, my loving Turtle every day, my lovely dogs Tuscany and Tulip everyday as well, so I’m going to try and make the most of what I can.

How do you ask for help when you’re not sure what the problem is but admit that there is one?

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