I survived

Some times I sit and think about all I have accomplished in my 29 years and wow this galaxy has been both bad and good to me.

I survived digging a big mud hold in the front of my mother’s house with my brother.

I survived being bullied in elementary school because I didn’t have a father figure in my life.

I survived my first therapist.

I survived a spree of cutting and my first attempt on my life in middle school. I lost my best friend to gang violence, and my beloved history teacher to a brain tumor.

I survived being part of a sports team, also in middle school. I became a mentor during these years as well.

No I wasn’t in the Girl Scouts but I had a good life, at least on the outside I did, for the inside soon became tainted.

I survived high school and its challenges. My depression and mania sprees hit hard. The rollercoaster was never ending and on more than one occasion I tried to end it, how ever the thoughts of suicide became more ramped. Just thoughts, not actions. If wake up thinking of how I could/should die.

During this time I met and fell in love with an awesome guy.

I survived being layout editor of my school newspaper and literary magazine, along with graduation.

I survived my family getting evicted from our house.

Next was trying to survive college, in which I tried and failed so I did what an sane person would do and enlisted into the U.S. Navy.

I survived seven months of doing nothing else but training and getting into psyical shape. Mentally I told myself I was there, but looking back I know I wasn’t.

I tried to survive boot camp, most of my readers know this is where I sustained my knee and wrists injuries. I survived learning how to balance myself on crutches and all the extra names given my way.

After the Navy booted me I wanted to go back to school. And no I didn’t survive 😦

My mental illness awakened and come out as though a lightening storm had occurred. I was admitted into the hospital where I was diagnosed with Bipolar type 1, now all I had to do was wait 21 days to met with my private psychiatrist. 21 long, excruciating, suicidal days!

I survived those 21 days.

Needless to say I survived my first psychiatrist who treated me as a guinea pig, and therapist who treated me as though I was a fraud.

I survived my parents getting divorced.

I survived being admitted to the psychiatric hospital, for a month, 1 month! This would NEVER happen again. The next time I’d only be in for 2 weeks, then 8 days, and my last was 6 days.

I survived each time I wanted to call it quits in between those sessions.

I survived being reunited with that awesome guy from high school. I survived him asking me to be his wife ❤

I survived my bestie, dying on deployment without me saying that I loved her more than words could speak.

I survived adopting and rescuing our dogs Tuscany and Tulip.

I have survived each of these trials and various others in between and yet it doesn’t seem to be as much to others, but for ME it is, because the point is that I SURVIVED!

As of right now I am a survivor and no one can take that away from me.


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